you dont know what i like

coming back home from my east coast trip #2.
saying good bye fucking sucks

onlybears

censor censor censor!!!!!!

why do i...
no, i don't.

ask me and i will tell you gladly
let me share my joy,
set aside your notions of
"whats good and right for Joseph"

"have you lit a fire under my ass...no"
"have you let my instinct reign as well...no, you haven't"
"have you all tied my shoe laces...no"
"have you all seen my joy of honesty...sadly, no."

onlybears can show the truth
onlybears are where the love repairs
my fucked up esteem
onlybears show me who i am

and i am ready to trust myself
and that feels so fucking good

so praise me for being a goddamn onlybear.

i swear i have pink eye....

arr arr arr
this is like exorcism
a purging of the closeness
i was blessed to have for a fortnight

so now i count the days, once agian,
counting down the days to close breaths
to pillow face,
to a soft kiss
to a laugh.
a quick smoke,
to a touch

jesus christ, i fucking miss you

3000 is a hell of a number

lets pretend miles were inches

you still would be way to far.

2 weeks...

here it comes...



here it stays...

dont this shit just make you want to JUMPJUMP??

I am learning,
Learning to toss out
My skeptic eyes.
Removing them from my being
And offering them to the moon

I am trying,
Trying to stop
My four minute mile mind.
Throwing up blockades
To give it a breath or two.

I am ceasing,
Ceasing to allow
My gut to be eaten up.
Instinct shall share the
Throne with reason.

"Let my eyes be the moss.
Let my eyes be the trash at stop 439.
Let my eyes be every captor that inspires.
Let my eyes be the cherry blossom leaves fallen on the cars, they are the new constellations in which I will read my future.
Let my eyes be every major, minor and diminished chord.
Let my eyes be the back of unforgotten neck.
Let my eyes be the beer bottles and cans, you boys are looking like skyscrapers!!!
Let my eyes be the death of my skeptic"

twenty-five

6 down
19 to go
let 25 be the one i want
as well

but the 25 are yours,
and yours alone.
do what is best
for you and the boot
on her way to peru,
for she is a good one
keep her in mind
at least one of the
25 times

don't tell me what 25 is
unless it comes to pass.

if it comes true,
then the saint of smiles
just might become my saint of peru.

pupils...

I am ready to loose
what sense of myself
I have left

(side note, i don't give a fuck about
my openness anymore)

my only want is not to undo my past,
but to start a new age.
An age where i learn
not to give up (for no reason)
so quickly.

follow through.
East coast,
chapter 7,
counterpart...
what ever it is.
see it to the end.

to do what is best for me

chapter 7...

thinking about it. I have a consultation on tuesday. i am only 26. damn kidney stones. damn health care system

light and dark

oh hell,
the kingdom is here

counterpart

Peter Black and I are business owners
click here

robot rock

may be a bit tipsy
but all i want to know
is what daft punk songs
you danced to today
in you head?

if you tell me,
i will tell you...

JE*^

escape into this night
flee from this day,
into the fading streetlights
exit joseph

need a walk

they hot-boxed their 6 year old girl...

spin, just spin around

what i would give for this again

elbowed in the...

do you all really want this,
my honesty?

I am honest to myself
I know my truth,
and what is true
just might destroy you
and what you think of me

let me clarify, this is to all,
not one

my truth will expose me
in this very moment
for everyone to judge
my truth will show no mercy
to me

it will leave me in the rain, naked

i agree
i have learned some honesty,
but what i know,
i will never show fully
because you might not like what you see

and i like how you all see me,
so why stir the waters?

i will show one, or two, or three, but not all...
because i hate watching myself fall
in other's eyes

but you... whoever you may be
let my image waste away in your eyes,
into a vision of something more real
than i ever was

into an ugly truth
something honest
a man who wish to wake from his filth,
not sleep in it...

22 hours in less than 48

see you all in two days...

rubies

cutting me down
right at the knees

as the criminal gets his
car searched by the
canines,
i smoke
i wait
i ponder
i recreate

I'M DREAMING FOR CHRIST SAKE!!

good god, Mr cop
I am dreaming again
without loosing my head
or causing heads to roll

my new name is "Mr. GO-WITH-THE-DAMN-FLOW"

i love falling into to it, thank you Mr. Kacey Meyer

how so, Mr ?

...you want is to exist in a way
that benefits yourself

...yet you know you also want to share
the beauty with others

...the trial is finding how to benefit
and share

...the truth sleeps softly within this
trial, this paradox

and the paradox, the truth, is i am never going
to fully exist for myself, yet i wont ever completely share all the beauty i fully feel


i wont ever be at ease with the/any path i choose

keep me guessing then

gold fish flying above your head

giving up the unicorn (the mystery)
for something more meaningful (the history)

this is just fun. joy rises.
an undefined care and concern for another's well being
an innocent risk

bring it
let me be your manager.

Mr. Sway

don't fade joy,
i am not done with you yet.

really..............

all i can say about today is "fuck it..."
work was terrible (800 in sales, walk with 85)
i want to hang out with my friends, but work got in the way
I haven't eaten (my own damn fault)
and some homeless guy pulled out his dick on the bus and started talking to it.

it will be tomorrow in about ten minutes.
thank god